New house – well, new to us… New puppy! We found the same day we moved in to the house…
We were very blessed to find a 10 month old Australian Shepherd, and the sweetest, most energetic, eager to please, wanna-be lap dog I’ve ever had. She truly is a blessing 🙂 And her name is Molly! The same name as the mini-daschund my family had for many, many years that recently went to heaven…
Austin and I (well, mostly I) wanted to get a dog for me, so I will have some company and something to take care of while he is away – 3 weeks or more starting today, and coming up soon it will be 12 months – after looking and looking we came across Molly. She is a constant companion, and although sometimes shy (and a nervous pee-er haha) she makes for a good “guard dog”, making sure that she knows where we are at all times and watching out the window for the unknown.
The past few days have been BUSY and somewhat stressful…. We had only 3 days to move in, get errands done (meaning everything I need in the next few weeks, anything from blinds to plates to food to a vacuum), and make sure everything was ready for Austin’s training. It has been very frustrating… feeling like we don’t have enough time. I have to admit – being the queen of list-making, next to my mother haha – that I might have pushed a little hard to accomplish everything on my list… What if we don’t get this done? This HAS to get done today… and worrying that we would miss something important, and I would be left alone to try to take care of it.
While my attitude has remained “good” for the most part, I have felt such turmoil on the inside. I tried to gain control over it, I tried to give it over to God – I guess I ended up somewhere in the middle of trying to give it up but still holding on… and last night was the breaking point.
I have to tell you – if I could have foreseen all the challenges, trials, frustrations, and pressure that my life holds now, I probably would not be here. There are even times that satan still slips a little doubt into my mind about being here… ooo I hate that! But my God HAS and WILL ALWAYS prevail!! Even in the times of ultimate frustration and feeling like I have no control over anything, I know without a doubt that God has brought me here, to this place with my husband, according to His GOOD and PERFET plan. If He had not prepared me for the present time, I would not be here…
I have been feeling SO unprepared lately, for what I’ve been facing – starting a house from scratch, being without my husband for long periods of time, feeling alone, lack of information and helping hands, feeling spiritually deprived – but one step at a time…
Matthew 6 – Do Not Worry
25“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? 26Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? 27Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life[a]?
28“And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. 29Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. 30If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them.33But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
Why Lord, why do I get so ahead of myself, and more importantly ahead of you?? How many times have you reminded me that you will take care of me, that you will provide for me, prepare me, never leave me… and still I live with such little faith.
Thank you Jesus, for never giving up on me. Thank you for caring about the little things – for providing a dog for me to take care of, and to make me get out of the house. I heard your whisper in the wind today – on a walk with Molly. Thank you for the wind, thank you for the changes… I know that You are always with me… Help me to live in Your promises every day, and cast out any doubts and lies that satan tries to tell me. I will do my best – that’s all you ask – that I give you my best, I give you my worries, cares, delights, everything… I can only do so much Lord, and You know that, so I am relying on You for what I cannot do.
Use this time of “rest” to continue molding me – into the woman after Your own heart, into the serving wife that Austin deserves, into the “city on a hill” in the destitute place, into a clear, and pure reflection of You… All for Your glory Lord, not mine. All for Your will Lord, not mine. All for Your timing, Your plans, Your control…
I praise You for Who You are!!! You overwhelm me with You greatness, love, and mercy… Help me show that to others, as You have had others show it to me. Thank you for Cheryl, and the encouragement that You have inspired her to send me… Thank you for Noreen, a new friend that was made only by way of Your PERFECT timing… Thank you for Molly, a little blessing… Thank you for Austin, a wonderful and patient husband. Be with him and protect him during this time of training… Keep his mind sharp, focused on You first and foremost, and on the tasks that are given to him. Guard him from anything harmful – physical or spiritual. He is preparing for warfare – for the U.S. Army and for his heart and mind. Keep him aware of his surroundings, and prepare him for what is ahead.
MATTHEW 6 – The Message (version)
25-26“If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don’t fuss about what’s on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.
27-29“Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them.
30-33“If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.
34“Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.”
Life as an Army Wife 