Everything Coming Together For Good

What a week!! I never knew so much could happen all at the same time! I guess this is just preparation for my army-wife lifestyle 🙂

I’m so human… God never ceases to amaze me with Who He is, and how He works everything for His purpose. I should know this by now! But God wouldn’t be God if I understood all of His workings…

Everything is coming together with wedding planning!! My mom, sister, and I went to a bridal shop to check out veils… we ended up finding my veil (love it), shoes (the last of this kind that my sister found on sale – and that can be dyed to match my dress), a sash (that now we don’t have to find fabric for), and a headband (on ridiculous sale!), and got my alterations done all at the same place!! A-mazing 🙂 While my dress is simple, I LOVE how it is turning out with the sash and little accessories…

I’ve been playing the longest/biggest game of phone-tag ever! But my cousin is making my wedding cake 🙂 such a blessing! And we finally (I think?) found ties for the guys to wear that “coordinate” with Austin’s Class A’s…

While all my planning is going on and I’m figure out school work and projects and work schedules… Austin has completed all of his testing for AIT!! Passing/Excelling with flying colors 🙂 and Honors for graduation! He has studied and worked SO hard and I am SO SO SO beyond proud of him!! He tells me stories all the time about putting in IV’s and the steps to process a patient, and a whole bunch of other things that I have no clue about haha, but he is so excited… this is exactly what he is supposed to be doing!! Basically, what an EMT learns in a year-long course and training, Austin learned in 8 weeks… He is EMT certified as well as trained in combatives (a fighting/survival training) as well as the “Whiskey” side or the combat medic side of his medical training. He is done with testing and is basically waiting to graduate… He leaves Wednesday for FTX (or a field-training program where he is out “in the field” for two weeks. Which also means I won’t be able to talk to him while he’s on the trip 😦 sigh…

But the events of this past week (not being able to talk to him for a few days due to some strange circumstances with some stupid army guys…. long story) have helped prepare me… also, not being able to communicate with each other during my E. Asia trip this summer (6 weeks!) was also a time of preparation. We both know that we are in God’s hands, and will protect us and guide us, even when we can’t talk to each other… We have such a strong connection to each other as well as a love with Christ at the center of it, that we can endure anything and still continue to grow closer to God and each other 🙂 If you’re interested, remind me to tell you the longer story about this past year…

I am trusting God through it all, not without saying that I have had some rough moments on my part… I am a worrier and a planner (two of the most incompatible things with army life – yay?) and sometimes fall into my old tendencies of “panic” moments when I let the weight of everything land on my shoulders… but God is faithful ALWAYS, not matter how many times I through myself into a worrying-frenzy, there is something or someone or some circumstance that reminds me that I cannot control my circumstances, but I can rely on the ONE who is in control… I am shaping my worries into prayers

So this week holds for me: 1. Returning to work full-time (aka early early mornings!) 2. Homework & projects (which I need to get done early so I can enjoy the two weeks Austin is home!) 3. A to-do list a mile long of little details to take care of in the next few weeks 4. My Shower!!

Goals for the week: STAY OFF CAFFEINE!! 🙂 so no one can say I didn’t try haha… Check 5 things off my list… Get 3 school projects completed/mostly completed… and get to bed at a decent hour 🙂

26 DAYS TILL I MARRY MY SOLDIER!!! And I have NO doubts, NO fears, NO worries… only hope, excitement, smiles, butterflies, and a prayer that time will absolutely crawl the second he steps off the plane and into my arms again…

Btw, I LOVE the “Message” version of the Bible… it puts things into a new perspective for me

Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life. Philippians 4:6-7

All I Asked For Was A Nap

“The most minor event can affect everything, and when that seemingly insufficient thing happens it sets everything else in motion…the most minor event can change everything…sometimes for the better, even if it doesn’t seem like it at first.” — Scrubs

As some know and most have probably figured out by now, Austin & I are getting married in 38 days!! 11.7.09

While this may seem “rushed” or “fast” by some standards, mine & Austin’s perspective on God’s timing is that it cannot be labeled, categorized, or completely understood. God had brought both of us together through many mountains and valleys, growing us as individuals as well as a couple. It would take a thousand entries to tell our whole story 🙂 but all in all God has led us to make the decision to continue walking in faith as husband and wife, and to follow through with our original plans of getting married in November when Austin is home on leave for two weeks between AIT and arriving at his post.

Originally, (before we were even engaged) Austin had been stationed in Washington state, and was being deployed in January… this remained the plan upon our engagement and the days that followed. However, less than a week after the ring 🙂 Austin was informed that his orders had changed and he would be stationed overseas…. with no information about deployment. While an amazing and confusing answer to prayer – Austin will not be going to the Middle East in January!! — this caused our plans to be thrown in the air… Now what? I still have a year of student teaching left… do we get married and move overseas hoping I can finish my degree there? Do we plan on a wedding for next summer? Do we plan on a wedding for after I graduate? What if Austin arrives at his post and finds out he’s being deployed in a few months??

So many questions and almost no answers… Which of course led to many panic-moments on my part 🙂 And Austin trying to focus on his training and figure out a plan for us. After days of praying and seeking wisdom from God, we decided that with the information we have, the best thing to do (as well as where we feel God is leading us) is to go ahead and have our wedding when Austin is home, and go from there… While a somewhat scary thing for both of us on many parts: what happens after that? where will he be in 6 months? what about my school? what will our friends & family think? We knew we had made the right decision, and God gave both of us complete peace about everything… God asked us to trust Him whole-heartedly, with every area of our lives. What better way to start our marriage than with a complete reliance on God?

Of course, we haven’t made our decision without thinking through plans for our future… we have made financial goals for the next year, we both have “mentors” that are counseling us as newlyweds, I am finishing up school here and will graduate in next December upon which I will go wherever Austin is, if Austin is not deployed next summer I will go where he is for the summer, and Austin will take try to take leave over Christmas to be home with family and friends… just to name a few.

God has done nothing but confirm our decision 🙂 from our conversations with each other to the support and love of our family & friends… Everyone is so excited!! And we could not have asked for more gracious & Godly people in our lives. We could not pull off the wedding that we wanted in such a short amount of time without their help… I am so grateful for all the people at CBC for doing all they can to support me & Austin 🙂 Our reception is basically take care of… my cousin is making our cake and helping with my dress, my bridesmaids are so flexible and look amazing in the dresses we picked out, Ms. Gail is an angel for doing all she has already done with decorating and coordination, my mom & aunt are lifesavers for all of their hard work and time, I could go on & on… if God care about the grass of the fields and the birds of the air, how much more will he provide for me?! I have found this promise to be more and more true…

So planning is coming along, and everything is coming together… every time I feel stressed or come up with something that we haven’t taken care of yet, it seems a matter of minutes before it is resolved! It is a blessing to be able to focus on the happiness of marrying the man of my dreams, instead of all the little details that could so easily distract me…

Even so, my human-mind will continue to fall sometimes… and in one of my stressed moments last week, I prayed for more time in the day to rest… all I have to say is be careful what you wish for! And be specific in your prayers, because God will answer in any way He sees fit 🙂 including the flu…

Yes, I woke up Monday morning feeling fine, and in a matter of hours felt like death!! I don’t remember the last time I felt so sick… I had to call my mom on a break at work to get her to make a dr. appointment. If anyone knows me well enough, they know how sick I am when I say I couldn’t eat anything all day! By the time I got home, it was all I could do to walk to the couch and lay down before the doctor…

Bonus tip: if you ever don’t want to wait at the doctor, just tell them you have flu symptoms!! They gave me my own mask and took me right back to my own private room with lots of cool flu tests… It was probably the best doctor visit of my life… except for the sticking a swab practically into my brain, yeah that wasn’t fun… anyways, the swine flu test came back negative, but the doctor said that the tests are so new that they aren’t very reliable, whatever that means 🙂 so they’re going to treat me for the flu, even though they can’t tell exactly what kind it is.

So I might have the swine flu, and I might not… regardless, I’ve been put on bed rest and quarantine for a week. No work. No school. Bed. 7 days. Alright God – I get the picture. Thank you for the time to rest 🙂

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.” Matthew 11:28

My God Is The God Who Provides

Oh my goodness… what a week!! From a crazy abundance of rain to ridiculous amounts of planning, it has been a been the best/worst week.

First, the worst: I am SUCH a planner!! Which can be good to an extent. However, one of my weaknesses is getting stressed and having girly-panic moments whenever dealing with unknowns… Now that I am planning the biggest event of my life thus far (my wedding!!), it’s about triple the amount of things to stress about in about 1/5 the time! Making lists, getting advice from a million people (again, good to an extent), prioritizing, finding a dress, coordinating plans with my fiancee (who happens to be 4 states away and in AIT), music, money, budgets, and all the while trying to figure out what I want and at the same time trying not to step on any toes…. OH! Sigh… I have to say that I have let it get to me…

BUT, the good WAY outweighs the bad…. I have rediscovered that God works His best when I am at my worst. I got to a point where I knew I couldn’t do anymore, and I had to hand it over to God. I have to admit that I tried to take control, somewhat unknowingly at first. I thought, God has brought me & Austin together and blessed our relationship, continually leading us and growing us in Him. So I figured, well, God is doing His part, so it’s up to me to plan and work out the details of our wedding… I know, crazy right??

So God gave me another reality check…. God truly is the ultimate Father. He let me know what was right (to always follow Him and seek Him first, in everything), but when I decided to make my own decisions, He let me. And when I turned back to Him, He welcomed me with open arms and a gentle reminder that I am to trust Him in ALL things, even the small little details.

Through it all, Austin & I have had some deep and meaningful conversations with each other and God. And as our day grows closer, we are also growing closer together and letting God prepare us for the new level of our relationship: husband & wife.

While there is much more to do concerning our wedding day, the pieces are steadily falling into place in miraculous ways: only God can accomplish this!! From provisions for the reception, to a great supply of genuine and willing volunteers, wonderful family & friends, finding a dress in an unlikely place…. everyday is another opportunity for me to rely on God, and for Him to work.

As for me & Austin, we are preparing for the next stage of our relationship and the next stage of our lives as God’s children… A question that has been rolling around my mind lately, is what do Austin and I want out of our marriage? What is our purpose?

Together we have decided that our purpose, first and foremost, is to seek Christ… and secondly to leave traces of God in our relationship with each other, our families and friends, in our circumstances, our opportunities, our location, and anywhere that God leads.

Colossians 2:6-7 “So then, Just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.”

Thank you Jesus for who you are! Thank you for providing for us in times of need, and for walking with us always, even in times of thriving. Whatever our needs, You provide for them in the best way: Your way. And even though I cannot see the bigger picture, and sometimes don’t understand Your timing, I’m trusting You! Thank You for Your work today – be with and bless those who are giving…

God’s Workings

Woah… God has such a way of showing/telling us exactly what we need when we need it. I went to a college Bible study tonight called Echo… I’ll write more about it tomorrow, but basically God has given me a peace about my situation. I’ve always “known” that God is faithful and in control, ya know, the whole Jeremiah 29:11 deal… But now I feel like I am actually living it out – my faith. I have a peace and confidence about mine and Austin’s future, our tomorrow, our 7 weeks, our next year, and the next 50 years… I have the bare minimum of information, but that’s ok. If you had asked me that even a mere 12 hours ago, I would have laughed or gone into a tizzy about my worries and plans and what not… all I have to say now is, How Dare I??? How dare I try to take the seat of God? He is the One in control, not me. He is the one who has planned my future, not me. He is the one in control of the entire universe, working everything together for His purpose, absolutely not me…. Read Job 38 (Austin’s favorite verses by the way) where God responds to Job. After all of Job’s prayers and his friends and family’s input about his situation, God draws the line and goes on asking Job, where were you when I made the universe?? Where were you when I did all these things I do, because I AM GOD!!

Woah… again I say. Reality check from the Creator. Whether I realized it or not, I like to play “God” of my own life. I like to feel like I am in control, I have a plan, I know what’s going on… However, in this current situation of a million unknowns, what I do know is God is God and He is in control, not me, and He has placed Austin in my life  to be my partner, my best friend, my love, my husband… I have to say I let the situation rule my thoughts and actions over the past few days, but God has given me the Proverbial “wake-up call” that I needed… God is obviously bigger than my situation, and Has a plan! Let’s go God… Here we are, surrendering our will to yours.

“… He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:6

Life…

Hello family and friends!!

I decided to start this to keep everyone updated on mine and Austin’s life 🙂 As you know, we are engaged (as of September 5th)!! I’ll post the actual story later… as well as where we are headed from here. First of all though, I want to say that no matter what happens or where we go/what we do, it is God that is leading us step by step. Right now, we don’t know much about what the next year, much less the next few days, holds. However, we are planning on getting married (the big ceremony and what not) next year, most likely in December. As far as we know, Austin is being stationed in Germany!! However, it could change… He gets his official orders as late as November 3 when he graduates AIT. (Austin has been in San Antonio, TX at Fort Sam Houston since June for AIT or Advanced Individual Training to be a Combat Medic). Once he gets his orders, we will know exactly where he will be, whether or not he will be deployed in the next 6 months, and we will finally be able to start making plans about our wedding and life after that…

Right now, Austin has 6 weeks left of AIT. He graduates November 3rd and will be home for two weeks 🙂 I am finishing up my last semester of classes before student teaching at Kennesaw State (finally!!). We talk every day, and pray together everyday… Keep us in your prayers about what God has in store for us this next year.

I’ll add more later 🙂 but now I have to study for a test… woohoo… I am thinking about all of you and hope that this will help keep everyone updated!

in His grip,

Meagan

“But I trust in You, O Lord; I say ‘You are my God.’ My times are in Your hands…” Psalms 31:14-15